‘I’m going to Miami. Uhuh…Uhuh…” LOL! I’m sorry, I’m just kidding, I think I’m going crazy already. There’s a lot of things to think of. A lot of decisions too. Big ones.

The reason why I was singing the stupid song is because I found out that now there’s a lot of condos being built in Miami Florida. I don’t know why, these days, I think the countries are haunting me. If I don’t see Canada somewhere, it would be Florida. It’s either I’m really being hunted or it’s just now that I notice them.

And although the real estate market has dropped, people are still buying condos and lofts in miami beach. I find it quite interesting. Probably the price is better, I mean comparably better when it comes to a condo miami. Hmm… If you think of it, then maybe the real estate drop only happened to the middle class, and it didn’t really affect the upper class in the US.

Of course they would be affected still, but not directly. » Read The Rest

After writing the supposedly heartfelt love letter, (which I think is a complete failure) I wrote this sort of essay about not feeling. Funny how this turned out when in the first place, I was trying to write about love.

Anyway, here it is. » Read The Rest

Aaah! I’m out of cash, and my next payout I don’t know how much that’ll make me. Ugh! I think I should really just run after my friend who owns me money. It is, after all my money still.

Haiz. This is so frustrating. I don’t want to ask my parents for money, because then they would worry about me, and push me to go to US ASAP. No way Jose. I’ll try it on my own first. If it really doesn’t work out, then that’s the time to fly there.

Anyway, going back to my friend, probably I could just advice her to take a cash advance or something. Then she can slowly pay back the loan on her own time. And I don’t have to worry about it.

She is working right now, so it shouldn’t be a problem right? It’s not as if I’m just being a brat. It’s just that I can’t concentrate when I know my ass is not covered. But I have too much pride to ask for help. Aaah! Sometimes, life can be complicated.

And I have to admit, sometimes I’m like the tippler in ‘The Little Prince’. I drink to forget that I am ashamed. Ashamed that I’m drinking.’ Not literally of course. I wouldn’t want people to think that I’m really a drunkard.

That’s also a weird thing. Before, I used to like to drink whenever I go out clubbing. But now, I just don’t feel the need for alcohol. I think I’m really getting old. Huhu!

Once, I had this conversation with someone. We were having coffee at Starbucks when he pointed out to me a painting that for some reason looks like a sperm. He said they shouldn’t be hanging such lascivious kind of material. (He was joking of course)

So I told him that it can not be called lascivious because it’s art. And then we went on to the whole debate of what can be considered art, and what is not. For him, art are those that are recognized by the art critiques. Like you know, Monalisa, the Cistine Chapel, Eiffel Tower and the likes. And the people who can create art are either geniuses or those who are privileged enough to go to an Art School.

I so do not believe this. I don’t believe in a structured grading process on art. Because Art is supposed to be free, and unrestricted. It is an expression of the soul, that transcends into the physical. » Read The Rest

I just finished reading a love letter, which I felt is so nicely written that I felt compelled to outshine it. Cathy also helped because she challenged me that if I’m really a writer, I can write anything regardless if I feel it or not.

Here’s my attempt. » Read The Rest

I don’t know if it’s the sudden change of venue, people, culture or all the other changes I’m going through right now but I’m having trouble focusing.

For some reason, I’m still trying to pick up the pieces. There are things that I’m just starting to realize now when in fact it’s so obvious during the time that they were actually happening.

I feel as if I’ve cheated myself. Aaaah!

There’s no way I’ll say out right what I mean by this. Probably I’m just blind. I need Zenni Optical: Sell Rx Glasses $8 with case!.

What is wrong with me? Grrr! I’m going against all my principles and all the rules I set for myself. Now I’m talking as if in tongues again. Talking in riddles. Haiz. I’m beginning to believe that I’m really weird. » Read The Rest

She has been one of my best friends for 10 years now. She’s also the ‘ungrateful‘ I was talking about.

Four of my other best friends also consider her as their best friend. But since last night, there’s only one left who considers her as a best friend. And that one is not me.

I’m writing this entry not to defame her.

I won’t even mention her name. I’m just hoping that somewhere in the internet, someone will be able to read this post, and will be kind enough to give me an advice. Someone who doesn’t know her, so there won’t be bias.

Okay, here’s my story. For years now, she has been borrowing money from me. Among all my friends, she’s the only one who’s not rich or well off at least. A lot of times, when I need the money back, she would ignore me and make it very difficult for me.

She wouldn’t be answering my calls, or sms. It’s as if I’m the one who owes her a favor. This has happened a lot of times in the past already. I don’t know why, I always end up forgiving her.

(Maybe because we’ve been friends for so long. Been through a lot together. We have a history of friendship. Both laughter and tears. And I always felt responsible for her, because I’m the stronger one. Maybe that’s why.)

The final blow happened quite recently. » Read The Rest

Aaaah! Why is sex following me around?! I really don’t want to talk about it, but it seems like the issue will not rest until I sit down and discuss it.

To be honest, I’m open to talk about the topic. I can talk about it, together with all the taboo topics that our society has labeled to be improper to discuss so casually. But for me, I don’t see the point for this topic to be given too much importance that we should make it a taboo.

And I also don’t believe that you have to be doing it to be able to talk about it. I think reading about it can provide more useful information.

So what topic about ’sex’ came up to me? No pun intended. » Read The Rest

Okay, I’m not entirely sure if I get this right, but it’s a coincidence. I was just thinking of how to put a poll in my site because I want to ask other people’s opinion about something, Which I think I would be writing about in just a while…

The thing is, I don’t know how to do it. Then by chance, I found this website that offers free opiniaon polls. Sweet right? These kind of things would normally happen to me. Like I’ll just be thinking of something, and I still would be unsure about it.

Then right before my eyes it would materialize. Sometimes, I believe in magic. Haha! But anyway, about this site, they offer these: » Read The Rest

1:00 PM January 22, 2007
Right on schedule, the plane took off. I was thinking, this is it. I’m finally going home to my family. To my country. I was taking photos of every step of the take off.

I want to remember that leaving Singapore, I was sad. Because I was able to really immerse myself in other people’s lives.

When the plane reached the right altitude, I took photos of the clouds. They were very beautiful. It’s a beautiful day.

Somewhere high above the sky, I decided to read through ‘his’ sms. A particular message caught my attention. I misunderstood what ‘he’ meant. It was too dumb of me. But I can’t blame myself. I can’t make sense during that time due to the sadness that has already overcome my senses.

That is when tears finally fell from my eyes. » Read The Rest